A Certain Moment

Okay, so being a junior sucks at the end of the year. At my school, we have to do a Decades Project, where we make a half-hour, memorized presentation about a certain decade or presidential administration. It's just what every kid wants, a huge project at the end of the year, plus two finals!! Yay! But it shouldn't be too bad. And then I get to go look at colleges...Exciting! Any suggestions for a history/theater kid?

What's the difference between honor and reputation? Which is more important?

The world is an unfair, unbalanced place. Society makes the rich richer and keeps the poor poor. There is no peace, only pauses between war. War is easy. You don't have to truly understand a people to fight them. You just send your young men to kill their young men. Sometimes not even that. You push a button and it kills their young men and demolishes their buildings. War is the failure of people to listen and understand. War is the ultimate cliche.

A certain moment
Occasionally well-defined
More often vague and hard to place
Effects a change
In behavior
Mood, outlook, life
A path is charted for those
Who know where the landmarks are
Others find nothing but ashes
But you know where to look
To see the shinning beacon,
Hanging from the ceiling
This moment will be long
Forgotten
While you continue to live,
Subtly shaped by it
Insignificance grown to purpose

Strolling Up Market Street

A light drizzle. I walk down the street, all sides filled with people, full of self-importance with someplace they need to be five minutes ago. I slow down, fall off onto a side alley. Calmly make my way to the old side of town. Music seeps onto the softly lit streets. From one door, big band, another, smooth jazz. From yet another drains the soulless life of last generations music, its message lost on a people who did not share its struggles. They all mix and form a peaceful tone as I stroll to a park. I sit and look on, bemused, as young men in tuxedos and young women in short dresses scamper about between shows and dinners and late night adventure. I see what they cannot. I look away from them quickly, the exuberance of youth too potent in the early evening dim. Instead, my eyes find the lonely old men who walk alone down the slowly filling sidewalks. Worn out by life, they search and find a bar, aged like them, to share in bottled solace. I smile at them, knowing they are the ancestors of those young tuxes. The rain begins to pick up, the street lamps now faint beacons in the mist. I continue my stroll, undaunted by nature. She has been here long before me and wont mind if I do not pay her heed this once. I find my way at last to that one cross-street, the place I am drawn to nearly every night. Seemingly oblivious to the rain pouring out to greet its denizens, life bustles on the street. Here is life. Here is where I live and breath and do my work. Here I live. I step off the curb and into the whirlwind of life. The real journey begins here...

Critical Mass

Well it's that time of year again. Yes, you guessed it, I'm sitting back at the light board for the high school band's Spring Concert. Joy of joys. The music isn't bad, some of it quite enjoyable actually, but it is so long…one does wish for a bit more brevity in these things. It has given me great motivation to read Grapes of Wrath, however, so at the very least it can be said that I have done my homework. The one thing I really love about these concerts is that the music provides great background noise to ponder. Being a wise, learned, and well-traveled 17-year-old, there is but so much to ponder. What is the meaning of life? How can one be truly happy? What's for lunch tomorrow? These are the imperative questions that are yearning for an answer, though not necessarily listed in order of importance. But in all seriousness, it is so nice to run into some free time. I don't know what to do with myself! A lot of stuff has been on my mind lately, it's good to get time to process it. Nothing coherent yet, but general musings and a more developed awareness of how humans function. Society is incredibly interesting, you should really look into it sometime. Especially the idea of the social contract. Fascinating how unspoken agreements between groups and individuals are all that's really holding the world together. On another quick note, don't ever let things fester. Life is better with honesty. Sounds cliche, it is. But it's a good idea. Also, never piss off the person who is going to be your boss. That's NEVER a good idea.

Exams...They Are Finished!

So as promised, a piece of writing. (Apologies, its not very good)
When one is told that something is definitely true, one's first instinct is to try to find a way to disprove it. When is one is told something is false, one similarly tries to discover a counter. But when one comes upon a piece of knowledge, untainted by loud pronouncements, one is inclined to take it at what it is: wisdom.

Exams. Exams. Exams.

AP Exams...they suck. AP Calculus today. U.S. History on Friday. U.S. Government next Tuesday. Two major projects this week. Plus, having to deal with crap at school. And try to stay sane. I'll try to write soon, once I get all the stress and bitching out of my system....

Birthday Punches

A day much like any other
Rising and living just the same
Nothing different
Nothing changed
Yet greeted by wishes
And unexpected greetings
And half-hearted songs sung by half-awake teens
And candy and cards
These things that visit once a year
Placed up as a milestone
A marker of what is to come
A special day for a single soul
Another day for the world
Celebrated as another year of life
One minute to another
Makes all the difference
Happy Birthday

Secrets

If one takes the time
to know another
One can often discover
unknown depths of desire
Whether you crave attention
Or seek the shadows
You will have someone who
Holds the key to your
Secrets

Prayers of the Night

Lord, deliver me from evil

Lord, deliver my enemies
into my hand

Protect me from those
who wish me harm
and guard me from the wicked

That I may be the swift bearer
of your divine vengeance

Grant me courage and strength
Be my shield

And bind thine Spirit into my blade
That I may send their eternal souls
down to Hell

I ask this through you
Almighty God

Grant me this
Almighty God

Amen.

Amen.